Are you thinking of adding your ex on your social media friends’ list? Thin again! Studies reveal that keeping a tab on your past relationships can be damaging to your current relationship. In fact a survey conducted by Joyce Baptist – a Kansas State University marriage and family therapy associate professor that involved 7,000 couples who are active on social media — indicates that ‘the more accepting couples are of “boundary crossing,” or communicating with someone they perceive as physically attractive, the more harmful it is to their relationship.’ Plus, scientists have found that keeping contact with an old flame after a breakup can make emotional recovery even more difficult.
There are many paths that lead to infidelity and this is one of them… If you’re still not convinced that’s a bad idea, here are some ways in which ‘friending’ your ex can negatively wreck your marriage.
It Can Emotionally Detach You From Your Current Relationship
It is very tough to recover from broken relationships, especially if it was your first love. Staying in contact with your ex re-loads your past romantic memories, which may rekindle the affection you had for the person once again. You may want to meet them again and stay in touch with them. And, if they are ready to reciprocate or harbor the same feelings, things may go downhill faster than you’d realize.
People often think that long-term relationships would never get affected by short-term connections, but that’s far from truth. It’s been proven that even short-term relationships can have massive impact on stable marriages.
Your Shift In Behavior May Be Evident To Other People
You may have enjoyed posting couple photographs all this time but as soon as you friend your ex, you see yourself behaving differently. You may feel uncomfortable posting couple photographs, or you may think twice before posting a picture since you begin to think too much about your ex’s reaction. You may also have an urge to post selfies to make them jealous. It’s not difficult for your partner and even your friends to notice this shift in behavior.
The Past Can Come Back To Bite and Wreck Your Marriage
You will surely have an urge to scour through your ex’s profile to check out what’s going on in their life. The more you visit your ex’s profile, the more frequently you will see updates from them popping up on your timelines (because the social media algorithms work that way). If you really want to recover from your old relationship and stay happy in your current relationship, this is something you will never want to happen. Don’t let your past ruin your present.
It May Put You Under Unwanted Stress
You may have recovered from your past relationship, but you never know whether the other person has or not. You may want to get back in touch with them on friendly terms, but they might easily misinterpret it as your renewed interest in them. If they didn’t get over you, they may want to establish the old relationship again, sometimes even against your will. This will obviously put you under a lot of stress, which might impact your current relationship too.
You May Feel Emotionally Drained
The best thing you can do to make your relationship healthy and happy is being you! A happy relationship is one where you can open up your mind without fear and react the way you feel. But that might not happen if you have your ex stalking you online. You may have to fake happiness even if you are feeling angry or upset, just because you want to show how happy you are with your current partner. This might confuse your current partner and harm your relationship adversely.
Finally, we have to handle a lot of drama throughout our life, so why add some more drama to it? Your ex may do many things to stir up your current life. Therefore it is best to let yourself be free and live life on your own terms. If you feel dreaded by your ex online, it will surely reflect on your present relationship and make things worse.
You have to face a lot of trouble while recovering from a broken relationship and now that you have finally overcome the hurdles, don’t let your past haunt your present. Stay away from the thought of friending your ex on social media.
Remember, it takes years to build a good relationship but only a moment to wreck your marraige. If you find yourself comfortable in your current relationship, friending your ex is most certainly a recipe for disaster.