By no means do we give advise on how to survive infidelity. We have gathered the below statistics, thoughts, and advise from various sources. Doing infidelity investigations we have found that more times than not there are more questions than there are answers. We are experts in the field of infidelity investigations. For questions outside our expertise we recommend consulting those most knowledgeable about them. Keeping that in mind the below information was gathered from many reputable sources to use as a starting point.
Statistics show that about 30-60% of married individuals will get involved in infidelity at some of their lives — though it’s just an estimation since the exact numbers can never be established. This clearly indicates that infidelity is becoming a bigger problem than most relationship issues.
People who have experienced infidelity know that it can be one of the most traumatic events, the effects of which can linger for a lifetime. In fact, it can impair a person’s ability to trust others and to build healthy relationships. As such, it’s almost impossible to survive infidelity alone. Whether you decide to move on or remain in the marriage, you first need to overcome the hard feelings and then find a way to mend things. Here are some tips we have gathered that can help you along the way:
How To Survive Infidelity – Vent Out Your Feelings
Look for people who will understand you and your feelings and will provide the necessary support. Share your feeling with your friends, family, colleagues or anyone you trust, as soon as you discover infidelity. This will make you feel better since you know there are people who love you and want to help you. You can also choose to vent out your feelings online at forums and discussions.
Do Not Hold Any Grudges
Practicing gratitude can improve situations to a great extent. This doesn’t happen overnight but nurturing a positive mind-set can help you evolve and eventually leave all your resentment behind. Mostly, the bitter feelings that stem out of an infidelity can act as a dead weight to pull you down, if you don’t train yourself to let them go.
Betrayal and despair can make you feel miserable, but take some time out to think about things that you appreciate in your spouse. You will feel a lot better and will be in a better position to make the right judgement.
One more thing that people must avoid doing is giving ultimatums. This worsens the relationships. You have more fights, your spouse becomes even more stubborn and both of you decline to compromise. So keep you calm and take time to get over your feelings.
Listen to Your Partner
You must never take a decision without listening to each other. A person engages in infidelity due to a number of reasons, therefore you need to know the exact reason of betrayal. Take turns to listen to each other even if it hurts. Refrain from saying anything in between, when you are listening to your partner. This might make things worse. Hear what your partner has to say and then form an opinion.
See a Marriage Counselor
If you truly want to save your marriage, it’s best to consult a marriage counselor. Some people may not be willing to share their experiences with a stranger or they might also think counselor are of no help, but people who have taken refuge under counselling have benefited immensely. You can try taking control of things, but if you can’t consider going to a marriage counselor.
You can also join online marriage counselling courses that will teach you how to talk to your spouse about infidelity, how to decide whether to stay in a relationship or give up and more. The best thing about these courses is that you do not meet anyone face-to-face but get the advantage of counselling.
How To Survive Infidelity – Start Afresh
This is the best thing you can do, whether you decide to remain in the relationship or decide to move out. If you decide to stay, let go of the bitterness and old thoughts and start the relationship afresh. Go out, spend time together and stay committed to each other; whereas if you decide to move out, snap all ties with your partner and give yourself enough space and time to recover from the broken relationship. Do everything that makes you feel good. Start your life all over again.